Angel City Zen Center - Beginners Only Podcast

Emily Eslami - Well, This is Uncomfortable (Death by Fire, Death By Ice)

Be honest, how much of your life is uncomfortable? If you're paying attention (and anything like us), the answer is probably a good chunk of it. So it might be a good idea to get to know that discomfort, get good at it even, or better yet, get deeply and intimately comfortable with that discomfort. Luckily Emily is on the case, taking on the famous koan of looking for the place that is neither hot nor cold. But I'll let Emily explain because she always has that way of boiling it down to what we need to hear:    "Are we going to go through every winter and summer without experiencing winter and summer? Are we just going to go through every winter hoping for summer, and every summer praying for winter? Or are we going to sit and be in our summers and winters.”

Dave Cuomo - Something from Nothing (History of Zen - The situation in Ancient China)

We have finally wrapped up our story of Buddhism in India and head over to where the real story of Zen begins - China. But first we have to get a little background on just who China was (old) and what it was doing (dealing with chaos like everyone else) when Buddhism and Zen first made their inroads. It's a fascinating look into how one society tried to cope with the problems of civilization through philosophy and deep thinking. This is the story of a single line drawn to represent the unity of all reality, and some spoil sport quickly pointing out that one line had just cut the universe into two. It's the story of two ancient rival philosophies trying to put society back together- stodgy old Confucianism trying to get everyone to fall in line and play nice, and witty anarchic Taoism telling everyone to just stop doing... everything. It's the story of why these two rivals absolutely needed each other to make any sense and how their fractured dualistic unity was exactly the ground Zen needed to do what it's about to do.

Dave Cuomo - A Brief History of Not Knowing

We know, Zen loves to talk about this "not knowing" stuff. And they sure seem to think they know a lot about it. But inspired by a koan that beautifully illustrates the idea, Dave got curious just how, when, and why this "Not Knowing" idea got stuck onto Zen. So Dave traces it all the way back to Buddha and what he said we could know, and then follows the bread crumbs up to the present day to see where Zen teachers got so confident about their own confusion. Along the way Dave tells some of his favorite stories from old Chan and even delves into his own history for some prime examples of what you think you know and what happens when you finally admit you don't. 

Emma Roy - A Time Outside of Time

Emma Roy takes us on a full exploration of ritual from its decidedly non supernatural intentions to it’s full ecstatic and world defining effects. Specifically she takes us on a close reading of the short well being chant, Enmei Juku Kannon Gyo, to see how it’s seaming invocation of a mythical Bodhisattva of compassion is more accurately an active awakening of our own true selves. Along the way Emma treated us to a full playlist of contemporary ecstatic sutras by the great Bodhisttvas Stevie Wonder, Joan Jett, and more as we compare rituals both mystically ancient and thoroughly modern.

Emily Eslami - The Great Mistake

Emily takes our mistakes head on with an in depth look at the concept of mistake itself, starting with Dogen's famous quote (up at the top). It's pithy, it's perfectly Zen ironic, and it opens up a whole can of worms of conundrums. What exactly is the Zen master's mistake, and come to think of it, what is a mistake at all? The Zen vows tell us not to discuss past mistakes, and yet here we are engaged in what most consider a serious practice of self improvement. How do improve on what's already perfect, and how do we forgive ourselves if we can't admit our mistakes?? (Spoiler alert, turns out forgiveness doesn't make a whole lot of sense). Is it a mistake to see our lives in terms of mistakes, and wait a minute, that doesn't make any sense! Emily explores all of this in personal terms and with deep dives into Zen lore as she traces Dogen's quote to its roots. The sangha takes to the topic immediately and applies Emily's talk in real time while they see if they can wrestle with their own mistakes without making any more while they do.

Dave Cuomo - Give Up, Give In

Recorded live in Nashville, TN! Asked to introduce Zen and share his own personal journey Dave goes bare bones honest with a talk about giving up and giving in to disillusionment and the liberation that comes when the bottom drops out on life and reality turns out to be nothing like what you asked for. Dave drops some history with Zen's beginnings amid the chaos of 9th century China and the worst disaster in human history and how Zen gave the only honest answer to that moment with its great promise of nothing. He goes on to tells his own story of giving up at the bottom of the barrel and the happy hopelessness you find when you finally admit to what you don't know. Along the way the sangha discusses how to help people in a world where no one wants your help, how to be angry without getting angry, and why you would never recommend Zen to a friend you want to keep.

Emily Eslami - It's a Miracle!

In a wide ranging and super mundane talk Emily Eslami dives us into Dogen's Kajo - Everyday Life, where Dogen takes us there and back again to the limits of the ultimate miracles of life as found in a cup of tea. Practice is just when we're hungry we eat, when we're tired we sleep (or have some more tea...), it sounds so simple! And it is, but it's that deceptive simplicity, as we're told this simple life is a forge that spans the whole universe. Forging what you ask? Why, perfect Buddha's of course! It's a perfect Zen talk filled with all of the poetry and contradictions that are really the only way to express and encourage this sort of practice. The sangha jumps in and discusses miracles and deities in Buddhism and how to avoid that pesky trap of nihilism that loves to rear its pesky little head in discussions like this.

Emma Roy - Self Caught Jail

Emma Roy brings us a piece by Kobun Chino about Dogen's Advice for Sitting. Our sangha has a bit of a Zen crush on Kobun lately and in this one we can see exactly why. It's a simple piece, mostly just about zazen. But as we've seen, Kobun has a way of being deceptively simple. Embedded in simple advice and encouragement is a wealth of insight, ironies, and koan like contradictions, with mic drop poetic moments that left us alternately dumbfounded or erupting in laughter, all managing to sound warm and comforting in his hands. From there the sangha picks it up and goes personal with their own reflections on practice, opening up a free form and wide ranging discussion that becomes a verbal zazen of its own.

Dave Cuomo - Who You Calling Perfect?? (History of Zen - Buddha Nature)

We finally bring our story in India to a close with one of the more perplexing and intriguing ideas to come out of early Buddhism - Buddha Nature. Somewhere in between grand God like notions and a humble healthy sense of self worth, Buddhism slipped in the idea that everything and all of us are ultimately and fundamentally perfect just as we are. It's a nice idea, probably definitely true from a certain point of view. But it brings with it a whole host of conundrums and contradictions, including most people's first reaction "what do you mean we're all perfect?? I'm pretty sure I can point out at least ten things wrong right now..." This is an ancient objection and Dave traces the problem from its simple roots in Buddha's encouragements to his monks through its more mystical later interpretations up to what it means today to look around and accept ourselves and the world just as we are. Some call that love, some call it God, we usually just call it zazen or not much at all.

Emma Roy - A Thicker Brain?

Emma Roy returns with more cold hard science on the professed benefits of meditation and then drops the ever pertinent question, "yes, but is this the point?" With some of the science pointing out that many people develop only the positive or negative results they are told they will achieve, we are left with the question, "what actually is the benefit we're after?" If we say it's nothing, is that all we'll get? But if we say it's something, are we just making placebos? Join us for a deep dive into the true meaning of benefit and what sort of benefits we might find when we sit past the point of looking for the point.